Friday, July 29, 2011

It wasn't always rainbows and sunshine..

Now that we are all friends here, I thought I would share something a little more personal and honest. A look into my first few months as a mom..

I had always wanted to share my story, and after reading this post by PattyAnn, I felt inspired as ever.

This is why the blogging world is so incredible, I now know that other women had the exact same emotions as me. I wasn't crazy. I wasn't alone. I just wish someone had told me that this was normal, that I would survive when I came home from the hospital. Instead I literally was going to lose my shit, to be blunt.

Coming home from the hospital was nerve-wracking yet exciting. We were anxious to bring our little girl home, however, we were also used to being in the hospital with doctors, nurses, and a button to push when you needed help. Call me terrible, but I sent Saige to the nursery both nights I was there. Mama needed to catch some zzz's. I was on such a high..that I should have known I would somehow come crashing back down to reality.

You see...I have received treatment previously for depression. I was on Paxil during high school for a year or two, and have now been on Lexapro since 2006. It was ok'ed by my doctor that it was safe for me to remain on Lexapro during my pregnancy, thank god. I am certain that if it weren't for my Lexapro, I would have been in a treatment facility for PPD. I know exactly how these women feel who suffer from PPD. During those first few weeks I would sit there nursing my little girl, with tears streaming down my face, wondering why I did this to myself.


Not that I didn't love my little girl to pieces, it was just all these emotions..and all the hormones. The combination of it all plus the sleep deprivation literally put me over the edge. To make matters worse, Saige would only sleep if it was on myself or my husband. So for 3 weeks, Saige and I slept on the sofa every night. I don't know what I would have done without my parents, especially my mom. She would listen to me sob on the phone. She wouldn't judge me. She would drive to our apartment in the middle of the night if I needed her. I have such admiration for those new mothers who don't have their families around, they are heroes in my book.

Around 3 weeks of age, Saige started crying and screaming once 6:00 rolled around. I thought it was the dreaded colic. Seriously, could it get any worse? I immediately started to look at my diet, wondering if it was what I was eating that was making her little tummy upset. I became stressed about my diet and went back and forth between breastfeeding and formula. I wanted to breastfeed until I went back to work but it was so difficult having to monitor everything I ate and drank.

Then I read "The Happiest Baby on the Block", discovered swaddlemes and white noise, and I gained some (not all) of my sanity back. I realized that Saige got so cranky at night because she was exhausted and overtired. I started using a heating pad at night during tummy time and it really seemed to soothe her through the tummy pains. We were finally starting to get somewhere and I was slowly seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. I realized that I could handle this huge life change.


I feel like a much stronger woman, wife, and mother. I don't feel embarrassed about my emotions, I now know that I wasn't alone. I will be much more prepared for my next child. As I know it isn't going to be all rainbows and sunshine. There may be some stormy skies..and I will be ok with that.
*as long as I have my 20mg of Lexapro*


Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Calling all chefs..food help needed!

Saige's 9 month appointment was tonight..my petite little baby is now 19 lbs 10 oz...
WOW..
She gained 2 lbs in a month!

I guess that's what happens when you start eating 3 meals a day

She is still eating all Gerber Organic 2nd Foods..and I know I need to start switching her to more finger foods and 3rd foods. It's just way too easy and convenient with baby food..
Question for bloggers though - are there organic 3rd foods? I have tried Earths Best but she HATES it..and i'm not too sure what else is out there. Any suggestions?

We have tried finger foods like puffs and yogurt melts, but most of them don't end up in her mouth. They are more likely to end up stuck to her outfit or on the floor. It just seems difficult to transition from baby food to finger food.

Thanks ya'll.




So What! Wednesday

This week i'm saying SO WHAT! if....

1) I don't remember the last time I cooked. It's not exactly something I enjoy and I have no problem letting the hubby take over. It also helps that the FIL owns a meat shop. We get all of our meat and most groceries for free. Marrying into the food business is definitely a plus.

2) If i'm 26 years old and just finally got off my parents car insurance....But then again, i'm still on their cell phone plan. And they pay for my AAA membership and EZ pass. Thanks mom & dad for not cutting me off completely.

3) I don't understand the whole hooplah over the babes first birthday. Perhaps its because i'm not creative. If someone could send me a "everything you need to decorate for a party" package, I could get into it all. Any volunteers?

4) Saige's scrapbook is only complete up to 1 month...and she's now 9 months. Gotta get on that. Probably comes down to the above mentioned un-creativeness.

5) I don't give a shit about Amy Winehouse. She practically dug her own grave with all that she did to her body. Hopefully she will send a message to other addicts to stay in rehab for more than a few hours (ahem, Lindsay Lohan).

6) I told my husband he can't get any lovin' until I'm finished with this blog post. First things first hubs.


What are you saying SO WHAT! to this week?

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Tuesday Thoughts...a mishmash of sorts

Happy Tuesday to all 11 of my followers (woot woot)
now please follow me peeps...

I have neglected my blog since Saturday due to some college-style partying, car woes, and house-hunting.

Saturday evening was spent in Annapolis with 15 of our closest friends - we celebrated an engagement, a new pregnancy, and just the fact that we were all together in one place. I drank one too many RBV's (red bull & vodka, my drink of choice), stayed up way too late, and was a hot sweaty mess. It was fabulous and I can't wait till we do it again.

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Due to my tiny fender bender, my car is in the shop...waiting for estimates, parts, and miracles. Oh yeah..and my rental car is a legit box on wheels:



I also have been rather spoiled with my hooked-up Toyota Rav4. It has bluetooth and I am highly annoyed that I actually have to hold my phone to talk to in the car now.
Like what a drag.
Spoiled much?



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We have been house-hunting since January. Currently we live in a rented 2-bedroom, 2-bath condo. Basically we rent out space from Saige, due to all her shit belongings. My mom and I refer to the condo as "the cave"...as it doesn't get much natural sunlight. I turn on every single light in the place and it drives the hubs crazy.

We need a real home, a place that is cozy & homey, somewhere we can put down roots.
A neighborhood with other kids, sidewalks, and a yard.

However, the Philadelphia suburbs are not cheap. The houses are a pretty penny. And the taxes? It makes my jaw drop.
Our house-hunt has not been easy. We made one offer on a townhome, and got outbid. Mostly due to my cheap logical husband.

We are making an offer tonight on a perfect home for us. It is the perfect size, is in a perfect neighborhood, and has a perfect playground/park around the block.

Wish us luck (and send $$$)

xoxo

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Saturday Morning Scene

We are linking up with Katie @ Loves of Life for......

Saturday Morning Scene

This afternoon we will be heading down to beautiful Annapolis, Maryland for a day of beers, bikinis, and best buds. It is about a group of 15, all high school friends, plus husbands/boyfriends if any. Let's hope we stay cool as it is going to be another scorcher. Here is a shot from 2 years ago:

So this is more of a Saturday Afternoon Scene I guess...
whatevs, at least I blogged.

Have a great weekend ya'll
xoxo

Friday, July 22, 2011

9 Months!

Saige Marie...you are 9 months old!
*actually as of yesterday 7/21, oops bad mama*

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This was our most difficult monthly photo shoot, as you have no interest in sitting still. You are a pro crawler and there is no stopping you now. Saige, you maneuver yourself from your back, to your tummy, to sitting like it's no big deal. You have also started pulling yourself up and cruising along the furniture. You are spouting out sounds and noises constantly and are such a talker. You say "dadada" all the time, no mama yet, but i'm working on it.


However, along with this new found freedom, has come many bumps and bruises. We need to invest in some baby gates ASAP. You have had one too many face plants into tables, sofas, and the floor. I believe we will be seeing many black and blue marks in the upcoming months & years. 
I actually retouched these photos to hide one on her cheek. Thank you iPhoto.


It has certainly been a busy month! We went to the beach at Avalon for a whole week. You finally got to meet your Aunt Lea, Uncle Bob, and cousins Sutton & Sloane from Oregon for the first time. You have also been spending quality time with mama as she is off for the summer. We will soon be heading to Bethany for another beach week. We have been spending a lot of time at Nana and Poppy's house as they have a pool, and well its more fun.


You are such an easygoing and pleasant baby. We went to dinner with some of nana's friends last night and they couldn't get over your happy demeanor. You are always smiling, much like your mama. I am loving the stage you are in and I know I will say that about the next stage as well. You are such a joy in our lives and we love you to the moon and back.


All my love <3
xoxo

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Me? A somewhat crunchy mom?

To be completely honest...

I used to make fun of people who were all about organic food.

I would babysit for families who shopped at Trader Joes & Whole Foods...and would eat organic mac & cheese  for dinner(what! not kraft spirals?). It was always so frustrating for me because I could never find anything good to eat for after the kids went to bed. Where was the buttery popcorn? Or the cheetos? What about some dunkaroos?

I was totally an organic hater. It wasn't my cup of tea at all.

I mean I grew up on PB & J, mac & cheese, and spaghetti. Nothing we ate was organic, not even close. Somehow my brothers & I survived.

But...once it was time for Saige to start chowing down on some baby food, I choose organic. Only because I wanted the best for my little girl. I hopped on the organic train..and i'm on it for the long haul.

I am so far from being a hard-core "crunchy" mom. 
I use disposable diapers. 
I don't make my own baby food. 
I only breastfed for 2 months. 
I definitely didn't have a "natural" birth. 

However, I am still very concerned about ingredients, products, and environmental factors which can have a harmful effect on S.

When it comes to vaccines, she is on the Dr. Sears Alternative Vaccine Schedule aka..she still gets all the shots, just more spread out among the years. Blame it on Jenny McCarthy...

Not to say what is right, and what is wrong...each mom has her own opinion, and we all want the best for our children.

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On a complete other topic...this happened today:




That would be the back of my car..
and yes I have a family sticker - it was a gift from my mom for xmas

I was coming off the highway and had to yield to merge off the exit. The car in front of me started to go, then braked..so I rear-ended them..and then got rear-ended from behind (tehe).  Of course I burst into tears, luckily Saige was at the sitter, and called my mom sobbing. I am still on their insurance plan so I can only assume they will be kicking me off after this incident.

Time to go drink a large glass of vino.

xoxo.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Saturday Morning Scene

We are linking up with Katie @ Loves of Life for......

Saturday Morning Scene


Our SMS is actually a picture from the other day, but the exact same thing happened this morning. Teddy tries to peacefully nap while Saige crawls over him, tugs his hair, and literally tries to bite his name tag. We are going to have to watch out for this little one as she grows - as I am certain she will go up to any dog on the street.


I am off to try to catch a few more zzz's while S naps.

Link up and show us your SMS!

Friday, July 15, 2011

A Teething Rant

The terrible teething monster has taken over my sweet and smiling baby.

It is the pits.

She is fine & lovely all day...but once about 6 pm comes, she turns into an uncomfortable & cranky mess.  And sleep? Fuhhhgetttt about it! For the past few nights I have been woken by shrill toe-curling shrieks - I will immediately console her but then she has trouble going back to sleep. Last night she slept from 2-8 in the crook of my arm. While I love all the snuggles - this is exhausting.

I've tried Motrin. Tylenol. Oragel. Next step - Hylands Teething Tablets?

I am desperate. I just want her to feel like herself again. I know this is only temporary, but it still makes a mama's heart hurt to see her girl in pain.

So...that is my teething rant. Thanks for listening...um, or reading.


Thursday, July 14, 2011

Just keep swimming....just keep swimming..

Saige LOVES the pool...to say the least.

So it is rather convenient that my parents have a pool & hot tub in their backyard, woot woot!

2 nights ago I found a baby raft in the poolhouse which we had purchased for my nephew when he was a baby...and it is perfect for Saige. She bites on the little toys in the front and turns to the side and dips her face in the water.

Swimming lessons will definitely occur in the future, especially after reading Katie's post about her great experience.

These 2 videos are too cute not to share...enjoy!!
*please excuse my annoying mom voice*



Wednesday, July 13, 2011

So What! Wednesday

This week i'm saying SO WHAT! if....


1. I let S chew on credit cards and keys when she gets cranky in the car....hey, whatever keeps her happy.


2. I washed a pacifier off in the ocean last week...ew?


3. I have abandoned my husband in Philly and have been staying with my parents. Who would want to be in an apartment by themselves when they can be poolside everyday with free meals? 


4. Baths have been substituted for evening dips in the pool. Chlorine cleans, right??


5. I ignore my MIL phone calls on a weekly basis. If we have to speak, i'd rather have her text. I think she's getting the hint.




What are you saying SO WHAT! about this week? 


Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Recap & Pics Galore

The past week or so has certainly been busy in the life of the L's. 

We were consumed by a week at the beach and my older brothers nuptials.

So...here is a little recap of all our events

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BEACH

To say the least, I need a vacation (sans baby) after this vacation. The beach is supposed to be relaxing - full of naps, gossip magazines, and adult beverages. Instead, our days would go a little like this: wake up at 8 (after being awake 1-2x during night due to teething baby), play with baby for 2 hours, put baby down for 2-3 hour nap which means only going out to beach around 1:30, lug 30 pounds of baby shit gear out to beach, try to stop baby from shoveling sand in mouth, force tired baby into BOB stroller to take afternoon nap on walk, go back to house - usually holding baby while stroller is full of above-mentioned shit, wash sand and sunscreen off baby, feed dinner, bed....repeat the next day.

Not to say we didn't have a great time with family & friends, I will just be looking forward to the beach next year when she is a bit more self-sufficient.

Mad props to AP for the Costco tent referral. It immediately became known as the "biodome" among our family. Also - if you need new beach chairs, run to your nearest Costco for the Tommy Bahama Backpack Cooler Chairs. They are amazing and keep both hands free. Which you will need for the baby shit. And it keeps your Twisted Teas cool.

Did I just say mad props? Wow.

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WEDDING

We shipped Saige off to one of my husbands aunts for the weekend and headed to Horsham for the wedding events. The rehearsal dinner was Friday night at a local Country Club and it was terrific.

The Mr & I
My mom and soon to be SIL 
The hubs and my nephew
Bridal party...yes there were 11 bridesmaids
Our ever-growing family
My parents with the soon to be newlyweds
My grandmother, mom, and aunts

Saturday was full of hair & makeup appointments, mimosas, and pictures. I can't wait to see all the professional photos as all the colors looked gorgeous together. The groomsmen wore light grey J.Crew suits with green & pink ties and us bridesmaids wore light pink.

The band was phenomenal. My feet still hurt from dancing.

The venue was perfect, same with the weather. They truly couldn't have picked a more gorgeous day.

My sister-in-law Katie looked absolutely stunning and I couldn't be happier to have her as part of the family. They are off on their honeymoon, currently they are relaxing on the Amalfi Coast and then will be traveling to Rome.
Getting ready in the bridal suite
Beautiful bride

The new mr & mrs


The hubs & I


Happy Tuesday
xoxo



Friday, July 8, 2011

Wedding Weekend

We are back from Avalon and now ready for a weekend full of love, family, booze, and excitement!

My big bro is getting hitched tomorrow and I will be getting a new sister <3  


Check back Sunday for lots of pictures and a recap!

Have a great weekend
xoxo

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Beach Pictures Overload

I hope everyone had a wonderful 4th of July - we certainly did.

I have somehow acquired a hideous stye on my right eye and ginormous spider bite on my right arm. Why is this happening to me at the beach? Of course I drove all the way to Cape May Urgent Care today...only to find out they don't accept Blue Cross Blue Shield insurance (WHAT?!)

Instead of an in-depth meaningful post about how great our week is so far..I will leave you with a few hundred photos!
















xoxo, Quinn

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Avalon Bound..

We are currently living it up beach-side in Avalon, NJ with my family and extended family

I am stealing internet off the house next door..therefore, blogging will be limited

Saige is LOVING the beach and has already eaten about a pound of sand (and pooped in a swim diaper, yikes)!!

We saw the Avalon fireworks tonight and she didn't say a peep...just sat and stared in awe. Pictures will definitely be shared later!

I hope everyone has a wonderful 4th of July...xoxo
 
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