Hopping on the "IF" bandwagon

As I have zilch time to think of a creative blog lately, i'm hopping on the "IF" bandwagon because its fun. and easy. and lets face it, you want to know more about me.

Fill in the blanks....

If I were to get pregnant again...I would hope it wouldn't be an "oh shit i'm pregnant" moment followed by tears and rushing to cvs to buy 34 more tests. I also would LOVE if I had the exact same pregnancy - no throwing up and an easy as pie labor. Crossing my fingers. FYI/TMI - Hopefully I will be getting pregnant again next fall.

If I could have any job in the world...If I absolutely had to work, I would be doing exactly what i'm doing, working as a school counselor. I love my job. I love the hours. I love the kids, well most of the time. Sure I would love to be a SAHM somedays but I also love to have a steady income.

If I had a day to myself...I would sleep. sleep. and sleep some more. Then I would lie on the sofa for hours, order papa johns, and catch up on my DVR. Ahhh that would be the life. I would also probably consume a whole bottle of wine, just saying.

If I could get married all over again...I would have the exact same wedding, it was beautiful and perfect. I just wouldn't be pregnant. So I could get drunk enjoy alcoholic beverages. Even though I did indulge in some dirty shirley temples...shhh don't tell. I also would have liked to have a crazy bachelorette weekend. BUT we did have a relaxing spa day which was wonderful.

If I could live anywhere in the US...I would live in NC or SC. They are such gorgeous states and I love the southern charm and hospitality. I also love me some Bojangles & Biscuitville. and Harris Teeter. That is one awesome grocery store. Now only if they paid their teachers more...

If my girl would have been boy they would have been named...Riley or Finn. There's still hope, perhaps the next one will be a boy? Saige also just got a new 2nd cousin named Riley, so clearly that name is out. My mom loves the name Rhys, but its pronounced Reese? I don't get it.

If I could have any talent in the world....I would be able to sing. I seriously can't carry a tune AT ALL. It is god awful...poor Saige will have to listen to her off-key mother for her whole life.

If you met me in real life...you would probably be shocked that my hair is naturally this blonde. And yes I do tan, i'm not albino. I get the "do you tan" question ALL the time.

If I could go back to school and get a different degree...UGH, seriously, at one point in my life I wanted to be a court reporter. Why? Because I seriously type like a madwoman. Not to brag, but my typing skills are phenomenal. And you can freelance and work as you please, even from home. I seriously thought about this, I even researched court reporter schools.

If money was no object...I would be one happy mama & wife.

If I could meet one celebrity, it would be....as of now? I would say Faith Hill & Tim McGraw. Sure it's two people but they basically come as a package. Speaking of package, Tim McGraw in tight jeans? Ow Ow. They just seem like such easy-going people who aren't caught in all the hub-bub.

If I could shop at only one store the rest of my life...how can I choose only 1 store?! Totally TJ Maxx, but only the one in St. Davids. Why? Because they have a whole designer section that is the shit. And they have everything you could possibly need. Providing I have food, shelter, water...you know, all those necessities.

If we were to get another pet it would be...a dog! Hopefully a dog will be joining the L family next summer. Now that we have a house with a fenced in yard, we are puppy ready and able. Goldendoodle please!

If I could go on a trip right now...it would be somewhere warm w/ turquoise water. A cruise would do as well. Any takers?

If I had to choose between a house cleaner and a personal chef...how would one ever choose between these two?! I need them both...just as bad. I don't like cooking or cleaning..clearly i'm not much of a domestic goddess. But..I would go with personal chef, I mean how do you think all the stars say so slim?

If I had the option of plastic surgery...TOTALLY, hands down, a boob job. Not bigger...smaller, more around a small B. Just some perky tits!

I'm sure that was thrilling for all of you..it's all I got right now. There will be more interesting material next week..after I unpack a gazillion boxes while trying to fend off my practically walking baby.

xoxo.

Confession: I've been MIA

I've been a terrible blogger and twitter-er.

I apologize to all my devoted followers. I will return in full force next week.

So where have I been you ask?

We've been busy settling on our new home

...and loving on this precious genius..

I just love her determination. It is amazing to watch her learn new skills.

Now excuse me, we are off to Home Depot and will be up to my ears in paint, spackle, and boxes for the rest of the weekend.

Monday Musings

I'm beginning to freak out a little bit...well actually freak out a lot.

We settle on our house this Thursday and then can begin the long moving process..

There is just so much to be done

paint

get new carpet

clean

pack & unpack

find bedroom & living room furniture

cancel utilities aka argue with Comcast

set up new utilities

...the list could go on and on...

My problem is that once we move in, I want everything to be perfect and in order right away. I guess I need to realize that this will all take time...as long as its presentable by Saige's birthday party. Or I will be going into super freak-out mood.

and we sure as hell don't want that.

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I also got a taste of what it would be like to have 2 babies this weekend...

I immediately went home and taped my vag shut

How do people do it? I can barely handle one. I went to visit my school friend Ali & her sweet baby boy Ma$on. Yes we ghettofy his name on multiple occasions.

We survived our weekend alone without Daddy...

and he was SUPER helpful when he got home.

not.

Happy Monday

xoxo

Birthday Sneak Peek..

Just wanted to give ya'll a peek at my adorable invitations designed by Little Laws Prints..

...are you ready for it?

Gahh...I can't even stand their cuteness.

They are perfect for the polka-dot theme I will be attempting to create!

Also, it will be our first party at our new house. Eek! I have never hosted a party, much less a party for 30+ people. This should go well..

Stay tuned for more updates..

Psst..I also may have found a sitter for Saige, waiting to hear back from her tonight

*cross your fingers*

xoxo

Dear Mother Nature..back off!

In the past 2 weeks..we've had an earthquake, a hurricane, and now torrential down-pouring.

Does Mother Nature hate us? Is she PMS-ing?

...she sure as hell must be pissed about something..

Because now she has messed with my older brother & SIL..and has left a trail of destruction & devastation.

They moved into their first home back in July. An adorable 2-story brick cape-cod back in my hometown. It was finally all starting to come together, furniture had been delivered and hangings & pictures were on the walls..

And then it rained...and poured...and kept raining..

You see, there is a creek near their house so they had to get flood insurance. Ironically, the past owners over the last 50+ years never had any flooding issues. Who would have thought it would happen to them in just 2 months of owning the house? A previous owner had installed 4 sump pumps in the basement, but they could only hold the water off for so long..

Not only was his entire basement flooded..but it was up to the kitchen counters on the first floor. My incredible 65 yr old Dad was over there at 2 am carrying all belongings up to the second floor...

My heart goes out to them...my heart hurts because I know how disappointed they are that this happened. Their once cozy first home is now filled with mud & rain debris. Please keep them in your prayers...as well as the others that have had devastation over the past 2 weeks.

xoxo.

So What! Wednesday

This week i'm saying SO WHAT! if...

1) I have typed most of my recent posts at work. When else do I get the chance to blog without a baby tugging at my legs? Or my husband giving me shit for not paying attention to him? I think he has developed some sort of jealousy over my new blog/twitter friends. He doesn't get it, they never do.

2) I have a spankin new Canon Rebel and no clue how to use 95% of the buttons. I could barely figure out how to attach the lens. I wish Best Buy offered some type of "learn how to use a DSLR" class...its clearly too time consuming and easy to just read the manual.

3) The sheets right now on our bed are Pottery Barn Teen...and pink/white stripe. They are soft..and the hubs doesn't complain. Speaking of sheets, does anyone elses significant other HATE having the sheets tucked in at the bottom? It annoys me to no end...please keep my side tucked in, thank you.

4) I'm more excited to see my brother and SIL's wedding photos than I was for my own. Speaking of, I haven't ordered one single wedding photo, how awful am I? My package included 3 8x10 prints, just the damn proofs are so small. I really need to get on that.

5) I'm pretty sure i've had athletes foot for the past year..so gross. And..it may have come from my labor & delivery hospital stay. I have the cream for it...i'd just rather itch it, damn I am nasty. Sorry loves.

6) I plan on donating half of my husbands wardrobe to Goodwill while he is away this weekend at a bachelor party. Who needs 2 full huge drawers of tshirts? Not him, the favorites just continue to get rotated.

7) This bachelor party means that I will have the TV & condo to myself from Thursday night to Sunday night. I can't contain my excitement about thoroughly cleaning aka throwing out junk..and watching trashy reality shows.

What are you saying SO WHAT! to this week?

Dear "Childcare" Providers..

Dear so-called "professional childcare" providers,

Thank you very much for your interest in caring for Saige aka my first-born, the apple of my eye, my own flesh & blood, would dive into an alligator pit for, etc..

I appreciate your willingness to meet with us and highlight all your amazing childcare experience and abilities. Clearly there are some parents who will trust you with their children...however, not ME.

Just because you have your own 12-week old old and now want to stay at home doesn't give you the privilege to charge $50/DAY. So you can ignore my child while you fawn over your new baby? HELL to the NO. And your house is basically a death trap with all the remodeling you have going on. Also, to the woman with 4 kids of her own - no you can't transport my child to and from preschool everyday while you drop your kids off. I want them on stable ground, not in your 1934 minivan. Does that thing even have air bags? I'm pretty sure my child will end up like this some day, duck-taped to the wall by your 2 boys who were running around with scissors (no joke)...

Luckily this is not my child

Call me over protective, call me paranoid. I just don't comfortable with any of these women that I have met so far in my hunt for a new sitter. This whole process makes me want to vomit, then cry, then smash my head into a wall. Heck, I made tons of cash growing up watching other people's kids and I was a nanny during graduate school. I so wish S could remain at her current sitter, just the morning commute would be miserable.

So I will keep on looking...or else, I won't be able to hit the snooze button multiple times in the morning. It won't be the end of the world, just this mama won't be able to catch as many zzz's.

Sincerely,

An over-protective first-time Mama

How I kicked sleep training in the babymaker

I feel like i'm going to jinx myself with this post..

..but whatever.

I need to brag.

I finally got the balls guts to attempt this sleep-training bizness. I had so many encouraging comments on my previous sleep training post that I knew I had to grab life by the horns and try a little, or a lot of CIO. So yes, I let my sweet little angel scream & cry. She stood there and sobbed..and it was terrible. All I wanted to do was rush in, scoop her up, and kiss her wet cheeks. But I didn't...I went out to the family room, turned on the tv, turned off the monitor sound (I could still see her), and tried to occupy myself. My stubborn Saige probably cried on & off for a whole hour and a half. I didn't go in at all, because I had tried that before, and it just upset her more if she saw me.


Since that first night, the crying time has decreased significantly. The skies have parted and she is now sleeping 12+ hours a night. Last night she went to bed at 7 and I had to wake her up this morning at 7. If she wakes up in the night, she may whimper a bit and sit up, but she can put herself back to sleep. I was so worried and apprehensive that she may feel abandoned, but she still gives me a bright & cheerful smile every morning.


All I have to say is...don't knock it till you try it..
..because it may lead to a sleeping baby and happy parents.